Broken bird
by sharingstories2
Summary: Slade wanted Dick when he was with the Titans but now he's with Young Justice and he's falling, into oblivion. Can he be saved or is it already too late
1. Chapter 1

The room was silent till Beast boy stormed down to the cells.  
"WHERE IS HE, WHERE IS SLADE?" he screamed. The man in question sneered as the league stood in front of him. They too wanted to rip Slade limb from limb but they knew that was not how they worked. Beast boy screamed.  
"MOVE, I SWEAR TO GOD I'M GOING TO KILL THAT-" M'gann stepped forward to stop him.  
"Garfield stop this right now, you're angry but Nightwing is safe he's not hurt." Beast boy scowled,

"This time." Everyone looked at him in confusion. Slade laughed,  
"Oh the little Robin didn't tell you-"a growl interrupted them. Nightwing stood behind everyone looking like he would be committing murder.  
"Naw will they ever know, Beast boy stand down he can't do anything anymore." Beast boy began protesting.  
"You can't be sure!" but his leader smiled grimly.  
"He can-not touch me anymore beasty, I know how to hurt him and I swear to god if he so much as blinks in my direction I WILL murder him" Dicks eyes were ablaze with fury. Everyone took a step back and Slade had a brief moment of fear. Dick would keep good on his promise and that scared everyone even more. As he walked out Slade laughed and quicker than lightning Dick turned around and punched him, knocking him out cold. He then proceeded to steer Beast Boy out of the room

In Dick's room Nightwing took a deep breath and hugged Garfield, whom for his part shook with tears.  
"You promised me, you promised me you would NEVER go back to him what the hell happened?" Dick sighed and sat down.  
"Gar, I had no choice it was either that or he'd blow up the whole mountain. Wally and Roy legitimately broke Batman's baterang in half when they found out. It took most of the league to calm them down. They found me and I used my new information to defeat slade." Garfield looked down.  
"You promised" he insisted, Nightwing kneeled in front of him. "You were never meant to know, how did you find out?"  
"Slade called Titan Tower and began to gloat, as such I rang Wally and he told me you were home and safe. The Titan's stayed behind but only because they knew the reasons you left. If they came all hell would break lose. Dick we thought we'd lost you." The elder of the two felt like his heart would break, beast boy was the one too help him after the last incident with slade and he knew being in Jumpcity hurt too much so he'd returned home but never had he seen Garfield break in the way he was. Never. He knew he couldn't do anything to help him so he just hugged him and home that he would feel better and overcome his fear of losing Dick.


	2. Chapter 2

After the fiasco with Slade Dick went to a safe house. He sat in the middle of the floor waiting. They would come, they always did but this time when they found him his arm was already bloody. They tentatively walked forward and one of them grabbed the first aid kid. The tension was thick as Dick spoke.  
"I made him cry, you know what happened with Slade and it r-reminded him. I promised him. I said I would NEVER EVER go back to slade… I broke my promise." They two boys sighed as they bandaged Dick up. He was always slightly unstable but at this point he was dangerous they knew that as soon as they watched the footage of Dick with slade, he was unstable.  
"We may have never of had the same experiences but we get it Rob- Nightwing sorry. I may not have the scars to prove it but I understand." Dick smiled through his tears.  
"I know that Kid, but…. You can see through the tunnel, I can't" Wally hugged him.  
"The thought's never truly go away Dickie." Dick sighed and the other boy in the room spoke up. He rolled his sleeve down.  
"We may not be a bat Dick and even though we stopped Wally before he started I still have the scars."  
"I'm sorry… I was… insensitive" Roy Harper smiled.  
"It's fine, Dickie I'm here for you" The youngest of the three climbed into Roy's lap. He cried, he cried until there were no tears and instead it was just his shaking form.

When dick fell asleep Roy wrapped him up in a blanket and sat next to Wally both looked like they'd aged ten years.  
"He's getting worse Roy"  
"I know, even I never got to that point" both boys tried to hold back the tears.  
"He's going to kill himself Wals and the only way to stop it is to tell the Bats" Wally looked at Roy in disgust.  
"It's because of him this was happening…. We can't tell anyone when Dick found out about you he didn't tell anyone, not even me Roy we can take care of him" He sounded like he was trying to convince himself more than he was Roy. They had dealt with Dick pretty well so far but lately he was getting Deeping into his own hell and they didn't know what to do. They couldn't lose their only brother. With that thought in mind both boys fell asleep as the clock struck midnight.


	3. Chapter 3

A few weeks had passed since they had found Dick and they had kept a close eye on him, he seemed fine but they knew the outside didn't mean a thing. Since Slade's arrest beast boy had become even more protective of Nightwing he all but killed Batman when he told Nightwing to stop acting like he knew best after all he did nearly get the team captured. That seemed to be the last straw for Roy who punched Batman and stormed off even Artemis had stood up for him. Batman turned to say sorry but Nightwing was gone.

A week after that Arrow had given Roy a hard time for not telling him about his daughter. In the end Arrow told Roy he was clone so what did he know about parenting. It was Wally that found him with blood smeared down his arms.

A few days later Wally was also getting yelled at by his mentor. Wally had run to Paris because he was bored but he had run out of nutrients and was stranded. Wally felt himself shake and had ran off. Roy and Dick shared a look that didn't go unnoticed before running to the zeta tube. Dick was the one who knocked the blade out of his best friend's hands.  
"No Wally this isn't right!" Wally for his part looked at Dick incredulously.  
"You do it you hypocrite!"  
"Yeah but I will dam well not sit here and watch you fall to for god's sake Wally you've see what that damned blade has done why the hell would you subject yourself to that!"  
"I DESERVE IT OK! Don't you see I'm such a disappointment, I didn't even get my powers on accident I wanted it to happen even my dad said it was a curse I need to punish myself." Roy went to intervene but Dick stood up, fuming.  
"They would be even more disappointed in you if you felt that they hated you THEY LOVE YOU, YOU ABSOLUTE MORON!" the boys looked at Dick in shock but he wasn't done.  
"FOR GOD'S SAKE PEOPLE NEED YOU WALLY… IRIS LOVES YOU AND SO DO BARRY AND YOUR PARENTS…. They're just scared walls. I need you even if nobody else does and I know you weren't trying to die but one wrong cut could kill you. If you died people would notice." Tears streamed down dicks face and Roy felt his heart drop at what the youngest was insinuating.  
"You would be missed too Dickie"  
"I wouldn't. You two might miss me for a while but you'd get over it. You can't die you've got a daughter if nothing else and Wally is a lovable idiot everyone loves, I on the other hand only stay on this god forsaken planet for you two. The Robins hate me deep down I'm the 'golden boy' but Bruce doesn't give a damn. He completely blanks me now. Alfred cares but…. He doesn't deserve to have my burden." The others tried to disagree but Dick was adamant. Eventually everyone calmed down, unaware that their mentors had just heard everyting that had been said.


	4. Chapter 4

Everyone had noticed how batman, Arrow and the flash had sent longing looks towards their protégées. They had also noticed how Nightwing was a little paler and Roy seemed to have a constant itch whilst Wally was slightly withdrawn and kept looking at Roy and Dick in concern. Yet no one had noticed Garfield creeping into Nightwing room just for the reassurance he was alive, they never noticed how he hung around Nightwing for just a little longer than necessary. It was only when Garfield had a breakdown after Nightwing was shot that Artemis demanded an answer. Garfield couldn't speak so Wally did. He told them all about how Slade had become Dick's creepy obsessive stalker and had wanted him to be his apprentice. It was at that moment dick walked out of the med bay and ran straight over to Garfield, ignoring the fact that his stitches really, really hurt. He took one look at Garfield and his best friends and knew they knew. He sighed and attempted to hug Garfield who was saying sorry over and over again.

"Beast boy?" the boy didn't answer.  
"Garfield, its ok they were gonna find out and Slade is locked up ok beaten and torn. He cannot hurt me" Garfield didn't answer and just carried on crying. M'gann walked towards her brother but was stopped by Nightwing.  
"He's gone and to be quite frank I'm offended to think you think he could hurt me I'm ashamed of your lack of trust, I'm the fearless Nightwing" the team looked like they wanted to kill dick for reprimanding the youngest of the team but Beast boy just laughed.  
"Yeah right you couldn't kill a fly, no wonder Spitfire and Raven beat you in an arm wrestle." Nightwing looked offended but it was clear to see he wasn't.  
"I'm offended young one how dare you" he then proceeded to ticked Garfield who laughed loudly. When he ran out of breath Nightwing stood up and pulled his friend up.  
"Megan take him to the Med bay make sure his oxygen levels are as they should be" M'gann took her brothers hand and walked off.

He saw batman out the corner of his eye and quietly slipped out of the room, it for once went unnoticed by everyone. Batman eyed up his young team.  
"Has anyone seen Nightwing" as everyone looked to where the bat had just been the shook there heads. Batman sighed  
"I'll look for him then, oh and Red Arrow, Kid Flash your mentors are looking for you" and with that he faded to the shadows.


	5. Chapter 5

When Wally saw Barry he knew the talk they were about to have wasn't good, especially since his aunt Iris was there as well. He sat down on the chair provided and frowned. Barry stood up and felt bile rose in his throat.  
"I… I'm sorry Wally, I've let you down. I just want you to know I love you ok?" Wally gulped. If he didn't know any better he'd think they knew about his _problems._ His aunt Iris stepped forward and hugged him, tightly.  
"I am so, so sorry you felt the need to punish yourself. I wish you'd understand that ALL of you understood we may be cold but we love you" Wally felt himself tear up until he caught her meaning.  
"Wait…who else do you know about?" he asked. Iris began to cry

"Those poor, poor boys oh Roy and Robin-"Wally stood up abruptly, shaking his head. No Roy and Robin.  
"Does batman know?" he asked. His uncle and aunt nodded and Wally suddenly felt the underwhelming urge to throw up.  
"Call him back, he under no circumstances can talk to Dick about this!"  
"Why?" Barry asked, puzzled at why he was more concerned about Dill than both himself and Roy.  
"You don't understand, my problems were being helped and were only just at the start I've never even properly punished myself like the other two, Roy is better now that Dick helped him. We didn't know Dick was all that bad till a few months ago when he brought up suicide. I can handle this talk at this moment I'm stable and Roy is nearly there but Dick. Dick feels he has no reason to live he wants to die and the only reason he hasn't is because he knows me and Roy would be destroyed and lately due to Garfield being all upset over Slade he knows Garf needs help but Batman is one of the main reasons he hates himself. He feels like he let his mentor down and one wrong thing from Batman could finally tip him over the edge me and Roy have tried to keep him away from, Call batman tell him to get to the mountain now." He then picked up his phone and ran Roy.

Roy had just had a similar talk with arrow and Dinah, they just didn't understand and Dinah had gone all counsellor on him and when he found out they knew about Dick he knew that Dick wouldn't survive long so when Wally called they both said the exact same thing.

"We need to find Dick"


	6. Chapter 6

Batman wasn't exactly known to follow orders but when he heard the desperate plea by both Roy and Wally he knew that going after Dick could result in further consequences. So he went back to find out what was going on. What he found wasn't pretty. The flashes were looking worried and the Arrows pacing. Batman himself was beginning to feel _scared_. He sat down and waited for someone to explain, in the end it was Roy.  
"He's suicidal, it was worse than Wally and I" he took a deep breath as Wally stepped forward.  
"Usually Roy or I can calm him down…. About a month ago we… we… we were almost too late." He looked directly into Batman's eyes, his heart beating at about a million times faster than usual.  
"I nearly lost my best friend, my _brother_ all because he couldn't cope with you, I nearly lost one of the only reasons I'm still here because nobody noticed, not even _you_. Some father you are" everyone stared at Wally in shock. It was silent for a minuet until an _rrrinnng_ erupted from Wally's phone.  
"Hello?" he said. Someone was crying on the other end but nobody could decipher what they were saying.  
"Hey, hey it's ok Dickie, where are you?" he said. Everyone visibly tensed, one look at Wally's face and it was clear what Dick was saying wasn't good. Quick as a flash he handed the phone to Roy."  
"Hey buddy what's wrong, there's no need to be sorry because you're not going to do something stupid are you. You promised us now how bout you tell us where you are so that we can come help you" Roy mouthed "track" to Batman who did as the older boy asked. When Dick hung up the result flashed on screen and Roy swore. He grabbed onto Wally who ran at super speed to dick's location. The others following suit.

When they found Dick he was passed out on the floor, blood gushing out of him. Wally grabbed the first aid kit. He attempted to clean him up and Roy set to work trying to clear his air waves. When the others came Batman stood back whilst the others tried to stop the bleeding. When they did they got him back to HQ as quickly as possible. Flash ordered everyone out as the medics got to work on resuscitating him. The rest of young justice were being held back from their leader. Wally and Roy were the only one's allowed near the operation. When they were done Martian man hunter delivered the verdict.  
"His heart stopped twice, he nicked a vein but were hoping that it can heal. His fractured rib from the last mission wasn't healed so that has been re-adjusted and there were scars covering his arms. Some weren't too deep and will heal quickly and others with take a while. He was given a blood transfusion due to lack of blood and he is unable to breathe so he now had a tube to help. The only question is of when he will wake up." Everyone looked shocked at what had happened. Silence deafened the room broken by the occasional sob. Garfield ran towards Wally and Roy before anyone could stop him. He eloped them in a hug.  
"He'll be fine, always is" the older boys smiled at the youngest.  
"He may not want to be fine anymore Garf." This only seemed to empower Beast boy.  
"Well he better wake up, I need to yell at him for breaking his promise" everyone wanted to tell beast boy that he wasn't helping but to their surprise Roy and Wally smiled.

"We do to kid, we do to" and with that the room dissolved once again into silence.


	7. Chapter 7

When Dick woke up he was aware of two things.

He wasn't dead

He could hear voices other than his team.

At first he thought it was just the league but when he heard "Is the Nightwing still alive" he knew that both his teams had found him and they would most likely give him a lecture. Nightwing coughed and the door opened. A flur of pink ran towards him, he tensed.  
"I am so, so happy you are an ok Robin I mean Nightwing" he grunted and saw Raven hover in with everyone else behind her.  
"Nightwing I'm only going to say this once, you are an idiot" Dick shuddered, he could feel the fury and worry radiating off Raven.  
"Yeah man you had us worried, not to mention everyone else" Cyborg added.  
"Guys he's just woken up maybe we should let the others look at him, Roy and Wally need him more right now" everyone turned to look at beast boy who was stood next to Roy, Wally and Martian Man hunter. Martian Man hunter looked over Nightwing and deemed him better than before. He asked everyone to leave as he took out Dicks breathing tube and did some more routine scans. When he deemed Dick fit enough for visitors but warned them to keep his blood pressure low. Both teams clambered into the room and waited for someone to speak. It was Wally that spoke first.  
"I'm uh sorry… I guess we didn't save you the way we were uh meant to." He looked like he was on the verge of tears and as such Dick nodded toward Roy to take him out. M'gann stepped forward.  
"I think what you did was stupid Dick but I also think you were really brave. You must have endured a lot for it to come to that point." With that she left the room, the younger of young justice hugging their leader and leaving with tears in their eyes.

Superboy stepped forward and clenched his hands. "I thought…. I don't really know actually. I know I'm angry with the fact you wanted to leave us all behind but I guess I'm scared that If they hadn't have found you that you would've left us." He relaxed and placed a hand on his shoulder and sighed.  
"Just don't do it again… please" and he turned and left. Artemis hugged Dick not even bothering to hide her tears.  
"I love you so much you are the brother I never had and I swear to god pull a stunt like this again and I will hurt you." Kaldur nodded at him and left with Artemis. Dick turned to look at the titans as the room fell silent.


	8. Chapter 8

It wasn't so much that things were awkward it was just that he'd rather have met them in better circumstances. He had left them in the middle of the night and they found him… after he tried to kill himself. Beast boy stepped forward

"Guys… can… can I speak to him alone for a second please?" the Titans stood off to a side whilst beast boy began talking.

"I… I know this isn't how it was supposed to turn out wing but the Titans… they won't go and I know you don't want them too. Just please don't… don't turn in on yourself I know you're close to Red Arrow and Kid Flash on one front but they… they dunno what it's like to see you waste away, going crazy and please don't let them. I saved you last time and I know what you're doing is trying to end your life but…. Don't let them see what I saw. I can help you…. If you let me" Beast boy looked at the torment his leader was facing and sighed. He beckoned the other titans forward and they all sat around him.  
"I missed you" Starfire said. Raven nodded in agreement, cyborg just stared at the wall trying not to cry. Dick wanted to cry, his attempt had failed and now his friends were paying the price.

For the next few weeks Dick spent his life in a daze. He faintly remembered Batman visiting him with the other leaguers and Bruce visiting him saying sorry and please forgive him. The rest of his teams had come to tell him they needed him, if only they realised they didn't. He was a waste of space, they were only pretending to love him, who could love him anyway. He was Dick Grayson the flying failure. He couldn't save his parent or Jason. Bruce hated him and everyone he thought had loved him had moved on although he couldn't blame Zatana or Barbara it still hurt. Yet he couldn't blame them, they were scraping the bottom of the barrel with him.

When he woke up he was vaguely aware of how much he didn't hurt, even though it hurt like hell he felt like the scars that littered his wrist hurt more. J'onn walked in  
"Oh good your awake, now can you just wait one second please Nightwing." He walked outside and waved his hand. Some other medics walked in, including Batman's personal doctor. They checked him over and deemed him physically capable to be up and about in three weeks but nobody said what they were thinking. He may be physically capable but where was he emotionally and mentally.


	9. Chapter 9

The next few days were weird for Dick, everyone was crowding him whilst giving him space. He had tried to talk himself out of the little hope that he was loved but couldn't. Hell even the new Robins seemed to be making his life easier, to be honest the only person who had changed radically was Batman. He had taken Dick back to the manor when he was well enough and had pretty much doted on his eldest son. He even let a few people in, mainly Roy, Wally and Garfield but when Dick complained he let some of the Teen Titans in. Life was easy but Dick was beginning to think that it would be pulled from underneath him. He could only stand to be smothered for so long.

It was around ten o'clock when he ended up on the roof, he wasn't really doing anything except staring at the stars. In the distance he could hear people call his name but he didn't have the energy to answer. He heard someone sit next to him and looked up.  
"Master Dick" he said respectfully.  
"Alfred" Dick replied. They didn't say anything for a while, letting the silence speak for itself.  
"How did you find me?" Dick asked  
"You may think you are grown up now but I took care of you, I know all your hiding paces" Alfred replied. Dick drew his knees to his chest and sighed.  
"Why do I feel so lost Alfred?" The butler didn't say anything and Dick began to cry, leaning into his friend. Alfred held the young man tightly.  
"I have never been in your position Master Dick so I do not understand but the mind and body is complex, the fact that you are still here proves your body thinks you are strong enough to survive" Dick shook his head and stopped crying.  
"My body is punishing me Alfred I don't deserve this" Alfred didn't reply, choosing to guide the boy back downstairs.

That night Brice was sipping on his Brandy, trying to remain emotionless.  
"What am I going to do Alfred? The boys won't tell us how bad it had got and I don't know how to save Dick from himself" Alfred shoulders sagged  
"Dick needs to want to save himself sir, trying to make his life easy and luxurious is not the way, maybe you should show him that people need both Dick and Nightwing. Throw a national Nightwing appreciation day and get Dick to talk to the boys, he needs to understand Master Bruce, he needs to understand that he is worthy." Brice looked up at his friend  
"Maybe that would work, I can't lose him" and then he put the brandy glass down.


	10. Chapter 10

For the two months Dick spent weeks talking to Physiatrists', the poked and prodded until he snapped, he punched a doctor in the nose and stormed out of hospital and called Wally who grabbed Roy and met the boy wonder in the old shack. They were scared at what they could find but were pleased to find him with a bin which he had thrown in his tools of destruction and any medicine.  
"Dick… what's going on?" Dick growled and fell back on to the couch.  
"The Titans have gone back home when they realised that I wasn't going to hurt myself again although trust me the cravings… they're there all the time and as much as I want to you all worked so hard to help me. I want to but I also want learn to live." He handed them a bag.  
"Which you are going to help me with, grab anything that can help me and throw it in there. I am going to make our hell a home" so for the rest of the night the three friends packed away things that hurt them.

The next week Dick ordered thing to help make the place a safe environment, this caught Bruce's eye.  
"Dick… what are all these card payments for?" Dick grinned  
"Well… as much as I don't think I'm worth anything... I realised that for some people I am the only reason they are here. I watched the video someone made about my crime fighting… it made me realise that even if no one needs me right now they always need robin." Bruce pulled his son into a hug.  
"I need you Dick… I know I may not be the easiest to talk to or get along with but you are my son and you never need feel alone okay?" He nodded and pulled out his bank statements.  
"It is just some boxing equipment and a self-help guide. I know we have everything I need here but I wannna be in the place me and the others set up. That place kept me sane and with the added addition then I can work through my urges and stuff there." Bruce didn't question it, he was just happy to see his son smiling again.


	11. Dear readers

Dear readers.

This is to address something that quite a few people have noticed, whether you have only read this story or others you may have noticed that a lot of my stories carry dark themes such as

· Suicide

· Mental illness

· Rape

· Abuse (of any kind)

· Self-harm

So I feel the need to stress this and I need your help. If you have read any of my stories and they have triggers, even if the trigger seems really remote could you please leave a review or private message, as much as the stories I write are for the reader's enjoyment sometimes they can be very triggering. Thank you.

That is not the reason I have written this note. I am here today to tell everyone that they are worth it, even if you don't believe it, I do. You are all stronger than what ails you and what ails you can be defeated, I believe that everyone has an inner battle inside them but you can survive. If you are experiencing anything, whether it be mental illness or you have been through a traumatic experience, hell even if you just feel sad or upset it is okay to get help. It is okay. I understand this is scary and it could mean that you will have to experience changes that you are not ready for but it will all be worth it. You can get there.

I want to wish everyone reading this all the happiness in the world, you deserve it. Remember you all have beautiful souls and its okay to feel sad and alone or whatever you are feeling. I want you to know that even if you feel like no one believes in you, I do.

Thank you all, I hope you all find happiness and joy in your lives.

\- Sharingstories2


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